Courtship~The Road Less Traveled

This seems like an appropriate time to introduce my chosen method of preparing for marriage otherwise known as courtship.  Whether you call it Christian dating or courtship is rather irrelevant.  It is really the purpose behind the relationship that matters. 

Ever since I was old enough to start noticing boys, beyond mud puddles and sling shots, my parents wanted not only me but my older brothers to realize the mistakes they made in dating and not to follow in their steps.  In my parent’s generation, courtship was a term used when describing how their great grandparents may have prepared for marriage--rather old fashioned.  Dating  was a 'figure-it-out-on-your-own' situation which many times didn't end well at all and still doesn’t. 

My parents taught us just how important finding the right mate was.  It's not something to caper with.  The way it is now, more than 50% of marriages end in divorce.  I think we can agree that there has to be a better way.  Modern dating is simply practicing for divorce.  We encourage each other to try this guy out or that one because you can't possibly know after just one relationship, right?  If we're not happy with the relationship, why let's just end it and find another guy.  I beg to differ.  It doesn't have to be that way. 

All three of my brothers approached a pending relationship for the very purpose of sorting marriage; it wasn't a game to be played.  They never kissed or held hands with anyone but their wives.  Strange?  Maybe.  But as Christians, we are called to be set apart, even in preparing for marriage.  In fact, every aspect of our lives should be a testimony and evidence of who Christ is to us.  So with that thought in mind, it is with great delight that I consider courtship.   

What might courtship look like in the Wagner home?  Well…all of my brother’s relationships were different.  Perhaps tomorrow I will share Dylan and Hannah’s story.  They just married on April 19^th.  A true love story for certain. J  Back to the process.  If a man wishes to get to know me in order to consider the possibility of courting me, he must first go to my dad.  I treasure my father’s input in my life and consider it a privilege to have his leadership and guidance in this area.  The young man and Dad will sort through the most important issues such as theology and other possible deal-breakers.  When all of those significant questions have been answered and after a time of praying—the young man, my parents, hopefully his parents and me—if all parties feel good about proceeding, then it’s time for me and the guy to begin to get to know one another.  Providing things proceed well, then a courtship is evident which is simply a commitment to continue to get to know each other more in order to pursue marriage.  It’s all very exciting!